One Step Forward
by silver-moon-sapphire-sky
Summary: It's a year after the Arrancar War and Toshiro has finally gotten tired of Momo's depression. Can she finally release the past and accept the betrayal? A little humour and Hitsuhina romance simply because it is in everything I write.
1. Part One: Shocked to a Halt

**Hey there, I know I haven't written anything in a while- I've had too many ideas, started them and got nowhere... don't ask**

**Anyway, I started reading some fics and there's quite a few which explore how Momo recovered from the betrayal, and I found my own idea for a story.**

**Thanks to all my reviewers for previous stories, I hope you like this one.**

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Part One: Shocked to a Halt

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She followed Unohana-taicho around like those blanks had followed Shinenju Senna. He hated seeing her like this; she was so empty, lifeless. At times like this, sometimes he thought they'd made a mistake saving her.

He adored the girl who'd been his childhood friend. But this sad eyed creature who didn't speak or show any sign of the bright personality that he knew was beneath her surface… this wasn't Hinamori. He didn't know her; and nothing and no one could reach her.

Aizen's death hadn't helped Hinamori- some part of her still desperately clung to the belief of his innocence. She couldn't move on, and every day, Toshiro felt his hopes for her return die a little more. It had been over a year, and she hadn't healed at all.

She didn't care about anyone- not Kira or Hisagi, who'd also been betrayed by their taicho, or Matsumoto, who'd also been betrayed by someone she'd trusted. She didn't even call him Shiro-chan or Hitsugaya-kun anymore, it was always Hitsugaya-taicho now… but it didn't sound right coming from her. It didn't sound as good as he'd thought it would.

She smiled with the others at a joke Kyoraku made, but… it wasn't real, it was a pathetic attempt. All of her smiles had become plastic, poor substitutes for the brilliant smiles he remembered.

Toshiro frowned- he couldn't stand watching her like this. He turned on heel and walked out. Avoiding her was not the most mature thing, but… if he didn't avoid her, he'd start yelling at her, and that wouldn't help- he'd already tried everything else he could think of. He was so ashamed.

Unohana and Matsumoto had already scolded him for his behaviour, so had some of the others, but it had been the words of those two women which had hurt most. He wished ba-san was still here, she had always known what to say, not just to Hinamori, but to him. This wouldn't have happened if he was an adult.

He felt so lost.

As a taicho, everyone expected him to have the answers, and sometimes he didn't know what to do. It was only his confidence which carried them through one disaster into the next, and his instincts.

He didn't know what to do this time though, and he knew that if it had been Kyoraku or Ukitate, even Kurotsuchei or Zaraki, in his place, that they would have saved her. Toshiro couldn't do it though; because he was a child, and nothing he said or did could ever be good enough. It didn't matter how much he wanted to help her.

He found himself sitting on the roof, looking up into the night sky, hoping that it had the answers he couldn't find. The night breeze was cool, and the still and silent sky calmed him in a way that nothing else could.

He closed his eyes, leaning back against the rooftop; he felt the tension slowly drain from his muscles as the ice from the roof encompassed him.

His consciousness descended into an icy plain, and the dragon within confronted him.

'_**Toshiro- why have you come?'**_ Hyorinmaru sounded surprised, an uncommon occurrence.

'_It wasn't intentional,'_ Toshiro, was confused by these events. Normally for him to reach Hyorinmaru, one of them had to be actively seeking the other's presence.

'_**There is a reason for everything, whether we know it or not,'**_ the dragon said cryptically.

Toshiro thought that Hyorinmaru had a warped sense of humour.

'_Perhaps,'_ he said, just as cryptically.

Not that he and Hyorinmaru truly needed words to understand each other, they were connected in a way far beyond that.

'_**Why are you here?'**_

Hadn't he already explained that he didn't know why he was here?

'_We have not talked like this for a long time,'_ he found himself saying.

'_**Did you miss me?'**_the dragon sounded both surprised and confused now.

'_I supp- Hai, I did,'_ he admitted, only just realising as he spoke, that it was true.

'_**What troubles you- your inner mind darkens with clouds and sometimes a rain of blood emerges,'**_ Hyorinmaru asked, his voice comforting Toshiro in a way that only three other people could- Hinamori, Matsumoto and Ba-san.

'_Hinamori- she has retreated inside herself, and she does not move on,'_ Toshiro said.

'_**Time heals all wounds,'**_ the dragon quoted.

'_It's been a year, and I feel her slipping further away, not recovering,'_ he realised that this too was true, and that he was terrified of losing her.

'_**Perhaps it is not I who should be advising you,'**_ Hyorinmaru said, with something in his voice that Toshiro didn't recognise.

'_Why not?'_

Hyorinmaru had always been able to advise him, and had never said such a thing before. Toshiro had always felt that his Zunpukto knew everything; it was almost terrifying to hear such a thing.

'_**I would say that you should not ignore your instincts- I would follow them, since nothing else has worked- what have you left to lose?'**_ the dragon said calmly.

Toshiro had never considered it that way before. He knew he was losing Hinamori, it became more obvious to him every passing day- what did he have left to lose?

'_I think you told me, exactly what I needed to hear. Arigato,'_ Toshiro said, feeling confident in himself for the first time in what felt like months.

Toshiro ascended from the icy plain.

'_**Please stop that bloody rain from appearing again,'**_ the dragon's whispered words did not reach Toshiro's ears, but somehow he understood. He also knew what that extra husky tone in the depths of Hyorinmaru's voice meant…

His zunpukto was just as unhappy as he was.

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Hinamori Momo was not surprised when Hitsugaya-taicho left, he couldn't stand to be around her lately. It didn't disappoint her when he left. She didn't feel anything anymore, she'd trained herself well.

She saw the disapproval in Unohana-taicho's face and in the faces of many of the other taicho and fukutaicho around them. But she still felt nothing. He meant nothing to her, no one did anymore; she'd made sure of it.

"Nei Momo-chan," Matsumoto-fukutaicho babbled excitedly about something, concerning clothes and nothing that Momo cared about anymore.

Momo didn't reply- what was the point? Nothing mattered.

Matsumoto-fukutaicho's smile grew fixed and more false by the minute. She glanced at Unohana-taicho in mute appeal.

Unohana-taicho's voice softly murmured something, but Momo didn't listen to her.

Kira-fukutaicho and Abarai-fukutaicho both began talking to her, but their words held no meaning and none of her attention.

She absently noticed Hitsugaya-taicho enter the room; he walked over to Yamamoto-Soutaicho. They began talking, and the Soutaicho gestured for Unohana-taicho to join them, the discussion seemed quite animated, but in the end, Hitsugaya-taicho seemed satisfied about something.

Momo still felt divorced from everything, she wasn't really there, but… there was something present she hadn't felt for… many months.

Curiosity.

She ruthlessly smothered it; she didn't want to feel anything.

Unohana-taicho walked over to them, she didn't look very happy, "Hinamori-san," she began, and then stopped, apparently unable to go on.

Hitsugaya-taicho walked over, "Hinamori, let's go," he grabbed her wrist, deliberately invading her space.

She would have pulled her hand back, and remained motionless, but his grip was too tight. She found herself walking at a very fast pace, almost running past the other fukutaicho and taicho, most of whom looked very surprised.

Momo followed him through Seireitei until they reached the fourth division. She didn't pay any attention to what he said to the Shinigami there. But the Shinigami left, at a run, and they were completely alone, for the first time in months.

He continued to hold onto her wrist, the warmth of his hand was pleasant against her skin. She didn't care though, even when his thumb moved in a slow circle over her pulse, which quickened for a reason she couldn't understand. He looked back at her and she couldn't understand the emotion in his eyes, and she wasn't sure she wanted to.

She looked down at the ground, breaking that tentative contact between them. His thumb stopped moving, and she almost felt disappointed, but crushed that.

Momo didn't feel anything; she didn't want to feel anything. She was empty, blank and emotionless; it was the only way to live.

She was surprised when something else zapped through her senses suddenly;

'_Tobiume,' _

She hadn't been allowed to hold her Zunpukto since she'd first raised it against Hitsugaya-taicho almost two years ago now. They'd deemed it safer to keep it away from her, until she 'came back to normal', but this was as normal as she was going to become. She couldn't deny Aizen's death, but she could deny everything else, even life.

Hitsugaya-taicho tied Tobiume onto his back, beside Hyorinmaru, and ignored the Shinigami who'd brought it to him. Probably protesting about the 'easy access' which placing the zunpukto there afforded Momo. It wasn't necessary, she wouldn't touch this reminder of her previous life as the fukutaicho of the fifth division.

Hitsugaya-taicho bolted, running and shunpoing, pulling her after him, and suddenly they were through the gates and running through Rukongai, into the wilderness that surrounded it.

Momo was surprised to discover that she was breathing hard when they finally reached the outermost edges of Rukongai, and that her legs were shaking. She had not seriously exercised ever since Aizen's… 'betrayal', and it seemed that she was seriously out of shape. That produced a faint twinge of resentment, but she pushed that away as well.

He finally released her arm, and she refused to rub her sore wrist, he walked away from her, and she remained where she was, refusing to move. He couldn't manipulate or control her so easily, and she wouldn't let him do it at all.

He untied Tobiume and suddenly flung it at her. She was surprised when her hands came up to catch it just before it hit her face. The force of it stung her hands.

She was surprised when her hands ran repeatedly over the hilt; she'd missed the feel of the sword in her hands. It was something she allowed herself to feel, because she couldn't hide or stop feeling that way.

"Draw your Zunpukto Hinamori-fukutaicho," Hitsugaya-taicho's voice broke into her thoughts.

Momo blinked, completely shocked, "wha-"

He cast a kido spell she recognised vaguely- bakudo, high level. It was a barrier to prevent anyone outside the area from entering. The wall that began to surround Hitsugaya-taicho, extended, to surround her as well, before going on to encompass a large part of the empty countryside around them. He spoke the final words to set and release the spell and it settled permanently- until he released it or died.

"Draw Tobiume," he said, drawing Hyorinmaru and turning to face her, his body automatically flowing into battle stance.

Momo blinked, "Hitsugaya-taicho," she whispered.

"That was an order!" he snapped, eyes hard and icy.

She flinched, and even though her fingers tightened on the hilt, she did not draw her Zunpukto. She refused to.

"Hinamori-fukutaicho, didn't you hear me?" his voice was louder.

She ignored him, looking at her feet; she heard the crunching of his footsteps on the icy ground. His reiatsu naturally made the already frosty evening, descend to freezing. She shivered as the cold grew, and she wished she had a shawl, but pushed that away and resolved to ignore the cold.

Momo had forgotten about the crunching footsteps, until a set of legs in black Shinigami robes came into her vision. He paused, close enough for her to feel the brushing of his robes against hers. She heard the faint sighs of his breathing, in and out. He waited five breaths for her to raise her head or speak to him.

She didn't do anything, and she had no warning before her ears rang, and her head was snapped to the side with a severely aching cheek.

"I SAID- DRAW YOUR ZUNPUKTO!" he yelled.

"No," she whispered, still surprised by force of his slap.

"WHAT DID YOU SAY?!" he shouted.

"No," she said looking up at him.

"DRAW TOBIUME, FIGHT ME!" he said, grabbing one of her shoulders, shaking her.

"NO!" she screamed back.

"I SAID –" he began.

"NO- NO- NOOO!" she screeched.

His tone changed abruptly, "I won't hold back Hinamori, if you don't draw your sword, you'll die," he let her go, and shifted back lifting his sword.

"I won't draw it," Momo said, her fingers opening, and she dropped Tobiume.

"Pick up the Zunpukto Hinamori," he said in a low, dangerous voice.

"No," she refused.

"Fine,"

He disappeared, and something smacked against her shoulder, the raw pressure flinging her through the air. She landed several meters away, hitting the ground shoulder first. It took her mind several minutes to piece together the obvious.

He'd shunpoed and hit her with the flat of his blade.

He was watching her, he paused for a few minutes and then he held up one hand, "Hakudo four, Byakurai!" he yelled.

White lightning raced towards her, and she used shunpo to dodge, saved by less than a second, and reflexes she barely remembered. She was extremely rusty, but not completely incompetent.

She used another shunpo to buy herself a little time, or distance. He might have used the flat of the blade initially, but it wouldn't last. His hakudo could have killed her if she had stayed. It had shown her that he was treating her like a deadly serious threat.

The faint change in the air around her was the only warning- she shunpoed to the side, and felt a warm trickle run down her arm. He'd cut her, and if she'd stayed there, it wouldn't just be a deep cut on her left arm; her torso would have been separated from her legs.

"Hitsugaya-taicho," she breathed, the icy air hurting her lungs as she panted, "what are you-?"

"Hakudo thirty one, Soukatsui!" he cut her off.

Momo shunpoed again, barely avoiding his kido, and tripped over something on the icy ground. She felt something warm run down the side of her face, and she couldn't stop her hand reaching up, fingers tentatively touching it. She brought her stained fingers down to establish what she'd already knew. There was more blood.

She ached; bruised from both falls, bloody from two cuts, and she slowly brought herself to her feet, wincing. What was he trying to do? What was the point?

She looked to the ground, and her mind stumbled over the fact that her faithful Zunpukto had been what tripped her.

"Pick her up," Hitsugaya-taicho's voice softly echoed what her instincts were screaming.

Momo slowly bent over, her hand less than a millimetre above the handle, and she wanted to close her fingers over the hilt. Her hand was shaking, and it would be so easy, but…

"NO!" she screamed, kicking her zunpukto away from her, eyes flying up to meet his.

She was surprised when he lowered his eyes, "very well then," he said softly. He dropped Hyorinmaru to the ground, and disappeared with a shunpo.

She half turned, but it was too late, he'd already tackled her from behind. He landed on top and she squirmed and wriggled, trying to break his hold. She realised that she'd miscalculated when her eyes met deep green eyes, and he was uncomfortably close.

He had her pinned; her legs trapped beneath his knees and shins, her shoulders were beneath his hands. She froze, held still by those eyes, so beautiful, so sad. They called to her in what seemed to be a language that she'd forgotten, and she felt like crying.

He blinked and the spell was broken.

"Let me go!" she yelled, trying to push him off- but he had planned this well, that and he seemed heavier than she remembered. It wasn't working- no matter how she much twisted or heaved.

"No," his breath was warm on her cheek.

She kept struggling, but still had no success, and she huffed, before sinking down, forcing her body as far away from his as possible. She turned her hair to the side, looking away from him. He would not tame or enchant her so easily.

"When are you going to accept it?" he asked, with something close to agony in his voice.

"What?" she asked.

"Aizen never cared about you. He abandoned you, and betrayed you," that was said coolly and flatly.

She shrieked, "how dare you!" and began struggling again.

"He's dead Hinamori. He can't hurt you anymore!"

"No, he isn't dead, he's not gone! He's NOT LEFT ME!" her left arm won free and she elbowed him in the head

"We both know that's why you cut yourself of from everyone," Hitsugaya-taicho's hand slipped, "you didn't want to get hurt," his weight fell slightly to the right.

Momo slipped out of his hold and threw him off, then she pinned him, "He did not leave, he couldn't have" the intensity of her voice made her shake.

"Hinamori, please, try to understand," he was almost begging her.

"NO," she shrieked and leapt away from him, running towards the barrier. She hit it and got repelled instantly, flying backwards several feet before she hit the ground.

"Hinamori- damn it, I don't want to hurt you," his voice cracked.

"Then let me out!" she yelled in response.

"No," the word was in a firm voice he'd never used with her before, and it completely silenced and stilled her.

"Hinamori, we grew up together, you're the best friend I've got- I'm not going to let Aizen win! He's not going to drag you into the grave after him!" the intensity of his voice, the pain, made her wince. "Besides, being a friend is about doing things you don't want to do. I'm doing this because it seems to be the only way I can help you now," his voice trailed off, tainted with uncertainty.

Momo didn't know what to say. Her Shiro-chan had always been confident and bossy. He'd never been uncertain with her; he'd never been like this with her at all.

But he was wrong, he had to be wrong, "let me out now," she said, sulking like a child.

A warm body was suddenly right beside her, "if you want to escape, then you're going to have to beat me first," he whispered.

She found Tobiume in her hand, and this time, she didn't drop the Zunpukto. She drew it from the scabbard and swung them both around in one quick movement, aiming at his chest.

He wasn't there; he'd already shunpoed out of her range. He stood, several meters away, waiting for her, eyes patient.

"Are you really full of so much pride Hinamori?" he asked, eyes becoming sadder.

"No," she answered, stung by his comment- there was a difference between pride and loyalty.

"Why couldn't Aizen be a traitor?" he asked her.

She refused to answer that and attacked instead, holding up a hand, "Hakudo thirty three Soukatsui!"

She knew he'd move to the back and the left to avoid her attack, so she used shunpo to place herself in optimum attacking position. She drew her Zunpukto and slashed down, hard and fast.

She was too slow; he dodged both attacks with little apparent effort.

"Hajike Tobiume!" she called upon her shikai to balance the power difference between them. Several balls of pink flame flew straight for Hitusgaya-taicho, curving to hit him all at once.

He used his own blade to slap the rosy flames away from his body. They exploded into the ground making creators and lots of thick white smoke which smelled like plum blossoms.

Momo was already onto her next attack, "Hakudo thirty one Shakaho!"

He was off balance from flinging her fire balls away, but he was still able to dodge the kido attack. She angrily stepped up the variety and frequency of her attacks, determined to win at any cost. Any concern over hurting him was forgotten in the absolute rage which had waited months to be unleashed. Now she was so far gone in anger that every attack took her further into it, and at this point she didn't even care.

"You didn't answer my question- why can't Aizen have been a traitor?" he yelled at her in between one volley of flame and another of lightning.

She was tired, angry and every attack drained her further. She felt surprisingly weak when she thought about it, and that just made her temper worse.

"Are you still on that?" she mocked.

"Are you still trying not to think about it?" he shot back.

Now that really did make her angry.

She focused all of her energy on her Zunpukto, and in response they both glowed a bright pink. She focused on the heat that was swelling in the blade, calling it to be red-hot. Her hair ribbon and cloth already loose from the fight, flew out of her hair and gusted away in the reiatsu generated winds. Her loose hair streamed straight behind her, glowing with her gathering reiatsu.

"Hinamori-" Hitsugaya-taicho began to say.

Momo ignored him; she never wanted to hear that- those words again. She had to shut him up, the power swelled, and she felt comfortable for the first time in months, there was something so satisfying about calling power and then releasing it in one large blast.

She called everything she had, but when she opened her eyes she realised something was wrong- there was still ice everywhere. The dragon of ice water which circled the tenth division's taicho gave her a hint, he'd released Hyorinmaru. The power levels on the field were suddenly unbalanced again, but she'd still go all out, maybe if she did, he'd be merciful and kill her.

Momo blinked, surprised by her own thoughts, and the self-pitying tone of them.

She forced herself to focus; she swung her blade and let loose the biggest ball of fire she'd ever summoned. She sent two more behind it, aimed straight at Hitsugaya-taicho and his guardian dragon.

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**Thank you for reading, and what do you think? **

**-No seriously, even if you hate it, I want to know!! I can't get any better without constructive critism.**

**Please R & R- there's little point in posting Part 2 unless people are interested in reading it, I promise there'll be a little fluff!!**

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****Translation of Japanese Words:**

_Arigato-_ Thank you

_Ba-_ Grandma/Old woman

_Baka-_ Idiot

_Chan-_ a suffix indicating a close relationship, often used by girls and when addressing someone younger.

_Fukutaicho-_ Vice-Captain/Vice Unit Commander

_Hai-_ Yes/Correct

_Haori-_ Hip/thigh-length kimono coat which Kyoraku Shunsui wears over the Shinigami uniform.

_Kido-_ Ghost Magic

_Kun-_ a suffix considered quite familiar, often used for addressing classmates and friends.

_Mou Hidoi-_ That's mean/rude

_Reiatsu-_ Soul Power

_Rukongai-_ This is part of Soul Society outside of Seireitei, anyone not in Seireitei dwells here.

_Sama-_ honorific- generally means master/lord, used only in cases of high respect.

_San-_ a suffix considered polite, often used for addressing people who you don't know well.

_Seireitei-_ The city in Soul Society where the Shinigami and nobility dwell.

_Shinenju-_ "Memory Rosary"

_Shinigami-_ Death God

_Shunpo- _Flash Steps

_Soutaicho-_ Head Captain/Commander General

_Taicho-_ Captain/Unit Commander

_Zunpukto-_ Soul Slayer


	2. Part Two: Letting Go of the Past

**Just realised that I forgot to put a disclaimer in, so I'll do it in this chapter:**

**I do not own Bleach, this wonderful series and the characters belongs to Tite Kubo.**

**Anyway, I hope you enjoy, there is a little fluff as promised, and there is a possibility of a sequel, I have an idea, but I'll only do it if reviewers agree that it's a good idea... maybe the story is complete the way it is and doesn't need a sequel. **

**Please let me know and above all, enjoy!!**

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**Part Two: Letting Go of the Past**

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She swung her sword aiming right for Hitsugaya-taicho, and releasing all of her power with that one stroke. The effort almost sent her to her knees, and a sudden stream of cold raced up her feet and chilled her to the waist. She was unbalanced by the sudden cold without Tobiume's warm power within her.

She saw the clash of fire and ice- for a moment there was nothing but steam, but then, an icy wind blew, and she knew what she'd see when the smoke cleared.

Her fiery attacks had been completely iced over, and they fell to the ground, shattering. It was enough to make her cry- all that wasted effort. Hyorinmaru still circled him, neither of them even had a scratch.

Momo tried to draw her blade up, but it was impossible. She looked down and realised that she'd lost this battle before she'd even started it. She was frozen completely to her shoulders; apparently it hadn't just been the unbalance of power from losing Tobiume's warmth, he'd taken advantage of the lack of reiatsu in her body.

She smiled; he had always been the better planner. She waited for the ice to continue its journey and freeze her over completely, before shattering. She would welcome it, she tilted her head down, letting her hair curtain her face, but death didn't come, nothing did.

"Answer me Hinamori, because you're not going anywhere until you do," his voice was quiet, but in the silence, it carried.

She immediately tried to wriggle, but it didn't work in any way. She was completely frozen, and completely immobile, except for her head and her hair- just swell.

"It's not going to work Hinamori," now he sounded slightly amused, and that just irritated her.

Momo stopped, "fine. What do you want to know?"

"Tell me- Why can't Aizen have been a traitor? Why are we all wrong?" he asked, sounding genuinely curious.

"Aizen-taicho didn't betray Soul Society; he had his reasons for what he did! He must have!" she yelled.

"Tell me Hinamori, what bothers you more? That Aizen betrayed everything you believed in- and all your reasons for becoming a Shinigami? Or that Aizen began a war that almost killed us all?" there was a hurt, raw edge to his voice.

Momo couldn't answer his question, because she was afraid she knew the answer. She couldn't even look at him; she used her hair as a screen and a shield to protect herself from those eyes. But nothing could safeguard her against his voice.

"It's because he betrayed you- not us, isn't it?" Hitsugaya-taicho asked slowly.

She forced tears back, "he's the reason I entered the fifth division, and the reason that I-" she began.

"NO!" Hitsugaya-taicho shouted, "He is not the reason you became a Shinigami- You wanted to be one before you even knew he existed!"

"But he's the reason I succeed! He made me, and if he is a traitor- then I," she swallowed, afraid of finishing the sentence.

"You are completely your own person. You are good and sweet and kind and the best friend I have. I know you, and you could never betray anyone," the words almost did make her cry- she didn't deserve them.

"We haven't been so close in years, and now you don't know me at all anymore!" she shrieked, angrily defending herself from the desire to beg him to help her.

"You think that if we don't spend every single minute together then we don't know each other at all? Do you think our friendship is that shallow? We were practically family!" he roared back.

"We were, and now we live separate lives!" she yelled.

"Do I truly mean nothing to you- was it really all Aizen, everything that's in your heart?" he asked quietly, in what could only be described as a broken voice.

'_I am a monster, worse than Aizen ever was,'_

"You think that you mean nothing, that you are nothing other than what he made you. In my eyes, part of you never changed, the part that wanted to become a Shinigami was inspired by what you thought Aizen was. He didn't change you; he didn't make you, only you can do that,"

There was a long period of silence.

"I'm so sorry Shiro-chan," she whispered.

He blinked; it had been so long since she last used that name.

"I apologised once, but then I asked you to save the person who'd hurt me, and who'd hurt you as well." She sighed, taking a deep breath; it was so hard to admit that she had been wrong.

Knowing that in the deepest depths of her mind had hurt deeply and it had made her angry with the world, but most of all, she had been angry with herself. She'd never be able to thank Hitsugaya-kun enough for helping her lose all of that overwhelming anger, it had helped her move along and now she saw things more clearly.

The words she'd kept hidden deep in her heart emerged in a torrent. "I wanted so badly to believe in his innocence, because I thought that someone I admired so much, someone who I wanted to be like, couldn't be bad. But you're right, that doesn't make me guilty, it makes me an idiot. I didn't want to believe it, I hated seeing it in everyone's face, but I was an idiot, and I was proud enough not to want to admit it and then I was lost and angry and- I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," she cried and the tears flowed hot and heavy down her cheeks.

"Hinamori no Baka, you made everyone worry- you frightened me," his hands were rough as they wiped away the tears, "but I wouldn't change you, not one hair," the ice around her shattered and then his arms were there, supporting her.

She fell to her knees, burying her head in his shoulder, "oh Hitsugaya-kun, I was so scared," she gratefully absorbed the warmth of his body against hers.

"You don't have to be afraid, I'm not going anywhere- I couldn't imagine life without you," he breathed, pressing his chin against her forehead, mouth against her hair.

"How could I have been such a fool?" she sobbed, fingers twisting in his white haori.

They were silent for a moment; he just held her firmly against him as she continued to weep. The sentimental silence carried on for many minutes, until he opened his mouth once more.

"It's not the silliest thing you've done," he mused suddenly.

She blinked, head moving back so she could look at his face, startled by the abrupt break in the mood.

He looked at her, a wicked smirk in place, "there was the time when you climbed the tree to pick a plum, only you found a wasp hive. Then you brought it back down with you because you thought the wasps were bees and they might be cold."

Momo twitched, getting quite embarrassed.

"So you brought it inside the house and they swarmed, and so you tried to use kido to soothe them, but it set them alight. So they went around setting the house on fire, and you flung everything you could find at them to stop them or douse the flames. Then I opened the door, tossed out the hive and they went into the rain- problem instantly solved,"

She twitched again, by now completely pink with embarrassment, "I was very young then," she protested.

His fingers were on her mouth shushing her, "what about the day before you went to the Academy?"

She twitched again, going pinker.

"You tried to reach the highest shelf and fell off the ladder- I broke your fall- much to my own painful misfortune," he added, with a heavy sarcasm in his voice. "And then you fell through the doors, so we were cold all night. The real irony being this was all because of a dried peach blossom- your good luck charm, which turned up in the last place you'd seen it- beside your bed, not on the shelf!"

"You know that I've always had bad luck like that-" she protested, actually turning red.

He interrupted her, "What about the goldfish at the festival? Or the time you tried to cook and clean? Or the time you thought that I needed a bath? Or the-"

"Okay- so I'm a klutz and a little silly," she snapped, with flaming red cheeks, refusing to look at him now.

Every time he did or said something nice to her, he always teased her mercilessly- it was quite irritating, even if it was a familiar routine and she secretly enjoyed it.

"Is that a bad thing? Everyone has to have a fault," he said half seriously, looking up at the stars in the clear, cold night sky.

"Well then yours is you never have fun, your too serious and-" she looked for a word, and looked up, watching him watch the sky.

He was so… beautiful, all of the cares and lines smoothed away so that he actually looked he age, "-you're too perfect to be real," she finished in a whisper, looking down at the ground.

He blinked, "Hinamori," he began, tone serious.

"Hitsugaya-kun, we should probably get back to the celebrations," she abruptly tried to change the subject, and pulled herself out of his arms, standing up, brushing off the snow.

He didn't move, and remained kneeling, then he leant back to lie on the icy ground. "Why? They are a bunch of boring old men and women," he declared, settling himself down and looking quite comfortable.

"But they'll be waiting," she protested weakly, gesturing at him.

"It's not midnight yet- they can wait a bit longer," he smirked, holding out a hand to her.

"But," she began, feeling guilty for not wanting to go back to the party.

"Don't you want to spend time with me?" he asked archly, raising an eyebrow, hand moving slightly back.

"It isn't that-" she began, moving to stand beside him, taking the proffered hand.

She had meant to pull him to his feet, but when she tugged, he tugged as well. Apparently he was the stronger one, because he pulled her down on top of him, and wrapped his arms around her.

"I'm not ready to share you just yet," he said firmly.

"Hitsugaya-kun, we really-" she began as a final protest, and twisted to look him in the eye, trying to be serious, even though she didn't really mind being with him. He was a lot warmer than she was and one part was dreadfully tempted to snuggle into him.

He kissed her seriously, his mouth quite firmly closing over hers and ending any thoughts she had of protest or anything at all. She'd never been kissed before, and she doubted he'd ever been kissed before, but it was surprisingly… it was amazing.

He eased his mouth off hers and moved his head back slightly, lying flat on his back. "Just for a little longer," he said, arms tightening slightly.

She slowly opened her eyes and leaned back against him, "I'd like that," she said, in a soft voice. She could barely absorb the fact that he had actually kissed her. She shifted her body down and snuggled against him, tucking her head into the crook of his neck.

She had always loved him, but she'd thought her feelings were those of one friend for another, even sibling love. She thought she'd loved Aizen, that her feelings for him were those a woman should have for the man she loved.

Reflecting on it now though, Hitsugaya-kun had turned everything upside down. The feelings she'd had for Aizen, they had been an admiration- not love, like that of a child for a parent. The feelings she'd had for Hitsugaya-kun, those had always been love, that of a friend and older sister, but now…

Now, she didn't know if she'd ever know love before. She had never felt so flushed, her heart had never raced like this and the desire never to leave his arms- for eternity to stop at this very moment was the most powerful emotion she'd ever had in her entire life.

He seemed to feel everything that she felt, "there's nothing else I could ever want now- not with you at my side," he whispered, lips just barely touching her ear.

She shivered against him, "Arigato, Hitsugaya-kun," she'd never be able to say it enough. How could you thank someone for saving you, in every way possible? Not just your life, but your purpose, your soul… your heart…

"You're not going to cry again are you?" he asked, partly worried, partly teasing.

"No," she said firmly, "I don't want to worry you anymore, and besides… there is no reason to cry, nothing is wrong," she finished firmly, and surprised herself by realising she really wasn't going to cry.

"You really are stronger," he whispered.

"And you've grown up completely," she commented, half sadly, he was so mature, so serious, and she felt almost uncomfortable with him sometimes.

"But some things don't change bed-wetter," he said, "child or adult I've always loved you, and that won't change, no matter how idiotically you behave," he snorted.

"Mou hidoi Toshiro," she snapped- he did it every single time, why couldn't he be sentimental for once? But if he was, then he wouldn't be himself, and she loved him best this way, because she understood what he was really saying.

He'd started laughing, and it was infectious, she didn't understand what was funny, but suddenly she started laughing too. Neither of them managed to stop for ten minutes, and their stomachs were aching, she lay in his arms in a comfortable silence, which had not been possible hours earlier. She had her head on his chest now, and could hear the steady beat of his heart.

"We probably should get back," he finally, reluctantly broke the silence, his hand toying with her tangled hair.

"One more minute," she whispered, "please," she looked deep into his eyes.

"If anyone comes looking for us, you get the blame," he informed her, and she knew he'd wait with her as long as she needed to.

Momo pulled herself up slightly and then leant down, brushed her mouth over his. "I'm not ready to share you yet either," she whispered against his lips, before kissing him deeply. There was a strange freedom in being able to choose to do this, and know that, she had no shadows in the past to prevent her from choosing him as her paramour.

He broke the kiss, and kissed her on the nose, then on the forehead, "we should get back before we turn into iceblocks," he said.

"This coming from you? The Shinigami who wields the most powerful ice zunpukto?" she asked archly.

"Do you want a puffy red nose? It happens every time when you get a cold," he commented, "and of course I wouldn't be able to kiss you or come near you for fear of you passing your germs to me," he added teasingly.

She had twitched at the 'puffy red nose' comment- as a child he'd asked her every time if she was trying to be a clown. She'd known she looked horrible, but he didn't have to be so rude about it, even now!

"Alright fine," she said, not really wanting to go back, but really not wanting to look like that any time soon, or at all if possible.

They stood up, brushing off the melting ice. He took of his haori and squeezed the water out of it, she was surprised by the amount the thin looking garment was capable of holding. She was even more surprised when he placed the haori over her shoulders.

"You're still shivering," he told her gruffly.

She looked down and found that he was right, and she hadn't even noticed.

He offered her his arm and she took it, clinging onto his warmth. He shunpoed, dragging her with him, she tried to help, but most of her energy was depleted by the battle, and he shot her dirty looks every time she tried anyway. Apparently he was still as proud as ever- a typical dragon wielder.

They raced through Rukongai- much faster than she could have on her own; they passed through the gate, barely even greeting Jidanbo and into Seireitei. Momo made a mental note to apologise to Jidanbo the next day, she felt so rude, but it was so cold.

They stopped via fifth division, at her quarters, and he forced her to change her wet robes for dry ones. He turned his back while she changed, refusing to leave the room in case she collapsed or something- and she didn't know if she was relived or insulted that he didn't try to peak while she was changing.

It didn't matter that he'd seen her naked when they were younger (Ba-san had insisted on shared baths, which he'd hated), or that because she hadn't changed much since he probably had a fairly good idea of what she looked like. It was slowly becoming an insult that he could defy his hormonal urges so easily.

She quickly forgot her irritation when he bullied her into putting a scarf and a shawl over her robes. She was forced to admit that she did feel much warmer, but she was still quite indignant about the treatment. She was the older one, not him!

He then took her to fourth division, where they found Isane-san treating the victims of a drunken Zaraki and Yachiru-chan- apparently they'd gotten an early start.

"Kotetsu would you please examine Hinamori? We were fighting quite recklessly, and I want to make sure she is completely fine," Hitsugaya-kun asked.

He then left to give them some privacy for the assessment.

"So Hinamori-san, would you please give me your hands," Isane-san requested formally.

"Hai Isane-san, and sorry for all the trouble I must have caused," said Momo facing just the beginning of her shame. She wondered if everyone she had once called a friend was scared to address her or felt uncomfortable around her now. Hitsugaya-kun had adjusted quickly, but that was different and special. She knew it would take a lot of time to fix her friendships with all the others.

"That's alright Momo-chan, the betrayal has left its scars on all of us in different ways," the taller woman said with a gentle smile.

Momo felt warmer just from hearing Isane-san's words. The older girl was so sweet, a natural healer just like Unohana-taicho, who always made a person feel better.

Isane thoroughly checked Momo over, her reiatsu levels; body functions- everything, and found nothing that a little rest and time would not fix.

Hitsugaya-kun was waiting for her outside the room, his robes were dry. He had obviously changed his clothes while she was being examined, he had left his taicho haori off and wrapped the red scarf she'd given him years ago around his neck.

"Hitsugaya-taicho, perhaps I should also check you over," Isane-san commented, looking amused.

Momo looked at her friend for a few seconds before working it out. He had a livid looking scratch down one cheek; she hadn't noticed it before, but she must have done it when he'd pinned her. It looked a little odd to see him, normally so neat and well presented, roughed up like that, and she began to smile as well.

"Would you please fix this?" Hitsugaya-kun asked, flushed faintly at this request, and Momo resisted the urge to giggle.

Isane-san looked even more amused, but she moved forward stretching out a hand. The scratch disappeared quickly, but the pink flush on his face did not, "Arigato Kotetsu," he mumbled in a manner she knew well from their childhood.

Isane's examination of him was much briefer, because unlike Momo he had been in perfect health before their battle, and his reiatsu was much stronger. He was fine, although his reiatsu levels were slightly down and he had a few bruises, though they'd be gone by tomorrow.

"Well, I suppose we can all go to the party now," Isane-san said with a smile.

The three of them began walking back to the party, along with the unseated officers that had been attacked by Zaraki and Kusajishi. They walked nervously and respectfully at the back of the group, Hitsugaya naturally as a taicho took the lead, and Isane-san walked beside Momo behind him.

Momo walked nervously, slowly sliding behind Isane-san and even further behind Hitsugaya-kun, her courage fading with every second. She had been an idiot; she had been horrible; how could she face her friends and colleagues after everything she had done?

A warm hand wrapped itself firmly around hers, and Hitsugaya-kun dragged her towards the brightly lit courtyard. She realised with bemusement that it didn't matter, because he would always be in front, behind and beside her with every step forwards she took.

She entwined her fingers with his, squeezing his hand, and took that last step forward into the light and back into her life. She smiled at him, and he smiled back.

'_Arigato Hitsugaya-kun,'_

**The End.**

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Well I sincerely hope that you enjoyed, sorry if the miniscule amount of romance annoyed you.

**Also, on the question of the sequel- yes or no? It would be romance/humour, let me know if you think I should write it or not.**

**Please review and let me know what you thought of this piece- because this is my first try of something that is not complete humour or romance/humour, and I don't know if it was any good.**

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**Translation of Japanese Words:**

_Arigato_-Thank you

_Ba-_ Grandma/Old woman

_Baka-_ Idiot

_Chan-_ a suffix indicating a close relationship, often used by girls and when addressing someone younger.

_Fukutaicho-_ Vice-Captain/Vice Unit Commander

_Hai-_ Yes/Correct

_Haori-_ Hip/thigh-length kimono coat which Kyoraku Shunsui wears over the Shinigami uniform.

_Kido-_ Ghost Magic

_Kun-_ a suffix considered quite familiar, often used for addressing classmates and friends.

_Mou Hidoi-_ That's mean/rude

_Reiatsu-_ Soul Power

_Rukongai-_ This is part of Soul Society outside of Seireitei, anyone not in Seireitei dwells here.

_Sama-_ honorific- generally means master/lord, used only in cases of high respect.

_San-_ a suffix considered polite, often used for addressing people who you don't know well.

_Seireitei-_ The city in Soul Society where the Shinigami and nobility dwell.

_Shinenju- _"Memory Rosary"

_Shinigami-_ Death God

_Shunpo- _Flash Steps

_Soutaicho-_ Head Captain/Commander General

_Taicho-_ Captain/Unit Commander

_Zunpukto-_ Soul Slayer


End file.
